Thursday, September 08, 2005

I've lost track of the days. I realize that I'm not going to be one of those daily posters. I have accepted that, and I'm moving on.

My dad had his heart surgery yesterday. It wasn't an emergency, in that he was rushed to the hospital. He was left to wait a few days in one hospital before he got admitted to another. However, when he got to hospital #2, he had the operation the following day, and the surgeon upped it from a double bypass to a quadruple bypass. Well, maybe someone will now address the issue of his diet. He was told to stay to a "regular" diet, but that wasn't really clarified. Therefore, the clogged arteries. But, he sounds positive because, as he said, he's had a "complete overhaul".

Meanwhile, I started school. Well, I went to the classes. I haven't really started yet. My mind is elsewhere, don't you know. I have difficulty focusing at the best of times, but now I have a real distraction, not just an interesting bunch of clouds to keep me busy.

My mom is holding up well. And by that, I mean that she's being as bossy as ever. She's such a trooper. Oh, and she's managing to be even more jealous of her sister than usual, but perhaps that's because we've seen and heard more of her sister in the last few days. Her sister has been very helpful. It's a sister thing, I guess, to be there and then not really be appreciated. Well, it's keeping my mother busy, with the bitching and complaining.

I'm really tired. It has been a long day. And I feel sorry for the dog. He came here, to my parents' house, because he was in the same position he's in today. The family that had him before us couldn't spend much time with him because the mother was sick and in the hospital. They had to leave him locked up in the garage for up to 10 hours a day while they were at the hospital. He's such a friendly, outdoors-y little guy...that must have been hell for him. He's had it really good (except the explosive fighting...he really doesn't like that) here, but in the last few days, we've had to leave him home alone for a while. Sure, he's got a 3,000 sq ft house to roll around in, the choice of 4 beds, multiple pillows on those beds and in his favourite hiding spots (in closets, under furniture), food and water... But still, I feel sorry for him. He needs, and deserves, a lot of companionship. Oh, but he's been receiving visitors lately.

Then again, my dad's going to be laying around for a few months when he comes home from the hospital, so the dog will enjoy that, but maybe only for the first few days. Then he'll get bored, and go back under the chair, his favourite spot.

Well, this is boring me, so I can imagine... I guess it's time to stop. Perhaps I'll have time to write again tomorrow.

Perhaps.

Monday, September 05, 2005

It's the day after my last post. Hopefully, this is the beginning of a new trend. Hopefully.

I start school tomorrow, and I'm excited in some ways. I've been lolling around too much, hating my part time job (in the service industry), and hating the way my life has turned out so far. I've had friends that I have lost, so my life has become very small. I work with people who are much younger than I am. They are just beginning their lives and starting post-secondary school, while I'm at a wholly different transition point.

But I have good feelings about this transition. Unlike my first round of education and the subsequent "career" that resulted (graphic design), this time, I'm preparing in advance. I went into graphic design with a portfolio and an open mind. I didn't have any connections, or goals, or much of a clue what graphic designers do. I applied to the program on a whim, with an attitude that if I got in, then it must mean something. There were approximately 400+ applicants, and I did get in. At first I struggled, but by the time the program finished, I believe that I was one of the top graduates. During the two-year program, I had had a summer job in a small design studio, which was something that none of my classmates had done. It boosted my confidence, and I believe that it boosted my prospects.

Upon graduation, I returned to that same, small studio. I should have known that being the new guy to a group of two who had already worked together for about 10 years would be difficult. Instead of realizing my own worth and abilities, I let this jack-ass who really enjoyed the "rush" of a looming deadline (which meant that he screamed a lot, and berated me) destroy my self-esteem. Instead of moving on to another graphic design studio, I decided, with some help from "fate" to switch careers.

One of my graphic design instructors contacted me about a new program that was being created jointly by my former school and another large post-secondary institution here in Vancouver. The idea was to train artistically gifted people how to use computer animation software, because people in the computer animation industry realized that the other programs were producing technicians, not artists. There was to be a practicum, and a bunch of the prominent animation and special fx studios in the city were involved. I got suckered in, and halfway through the program, the prominent studios decided to back out of the deal due to "security reasons". This meant that they didn't want students working for them and stealing their secrets. How stupid was that? We were spending $5,000 on this course (a deal at the time), and then they thought that we would risk our careers by being thieves!!! They mustn't have thought that we were very smart.

Turns out that I wasn't. I got a couple of interviews with a couple of studios, who wanted to see more, and told me to come back after more schooling. At the time, I was dead broke, so I went back to the golf course where I had previously worked. In fact, it was another "fate" thing, in that one of the managers phoned me to see if I was busy on the weekend because they really, really needed someone to work. Considering that I had less than double-digits in my bank account, I said that I would. I continued working there while I tried to figure out my next step.

While figuring, I did some research on the internet, and came up with technical writing as an option. Words had become more interesting to me, especially when working in graphic design. Some of the documents I had to work on were written so poorly...it was difficult for me to ignore. Now, I'm no expert, but I certainly do know when the incorrect "there, their, or they're" is being used. I looked into technical writing, and found out that I can still utilize some of my graphic design training (especially if I got into information design).

However, my research did indicate to me that there are many more advertisements for writing generalists, rather than specialists. A technical writer would be considered a specialist. So, I've enrolled in a business writing program at the first post-secondary school I ever attended. It sounds like an excellent program. The progam head is extremely passionate about her program. And there is an extensive work-experience session over the summer break. I'm looking forward to getting back into a professional setting, as well as meeting new people and making new friends.

And that all starts tomorrow.

And I'm a little bit scared, which is stupid, when I think about what the people are going through in the southern United States. But I'm not going to get into that, because there are many more smart, educated people who can comment better than me.

So for now, I'm going to sign off. It's like Christmas. The sooner I get to bed, the sooner tomorrow comes.

Good night.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

It's day four of my blog, and I'm already deliquent. How unexpected. Friday (day 2) was going to be a write-off because I was working. I knew that, and was prepared for that. However, I didn't return Saturday. Why? Because I was tired from all the back and forth to the hospital.

The update from Friday goes like this: My father was admitted to the hospital to wait for heart surgery. Neither the hospital where he's suppose to have the surgery nor the surgeon have room for him, so he has been admitted to another hospital to wait, and hopefully to prevent him from having a heart attack. I can't say for sure, but I think that the rescheduling of his original surgery date has probably made the situation worse. I think that it's ironic (and pathetic) that they do that to heart patients. Don't they have enough stress as it is? (By definition, ie Type A, I think that they do).

So he and my mom went to their family doctor Friday morning to get prescriptions renewed, and the family dr decided to admit him. The hospital is near the dr's office, so they just went there after the appointment. This meant that my mother might have to drive home. Let's review: she has MS, vertigo, and is slightly (understatement) forgetful, and since my dad "retired", he has been doing most of the driving. When he doesn't drive, that's usually because I'm there. The idea of her driving home, during rush hour, did not rest well with me, so I phoned my uncle, who said that he would drop me off at the hospital. I had also phoned my cousin, who was off for the week, to see if she could give me a ride. I left a message with her.

My mother had decided that she would drive home because I was working on Friday night, and she thought that it would be a hassle for me to drive from the dr's, and then to work. To me, it was less of a worry than leaving her to drive herself. So when I drove her home, I thought that the problem was solved. She was "safe" at home (not driving), and therefore I wouldn't have to worry.

Except a few hours later, when I got a phone call from my cousin: "Do you know where your mother is?" I was still trying to decide if it was one of those trick questions, and that she knew where my mother was, when she told me that she had phoned the house a couple of times, left messages, and hadn't heard back. Immediately, I was pissed and panicked. It wasn't time for her to take the dog out for a pee (he's on a schedule so she doesn't forget...she dreamt that up), and there was no logical reason for her to be away from the phone for so long. My cousin said that she would try again in a few minutes, and if she didn't get a response, she would drive over to see what was going on. She lives less than two minutes away. I figured that it really didn't matter; if something had happened, it was nearly too late, anyhow.

I waited a couple of minutes, and then decided to phone my mother's cell phone. Both my cousin and I had hesitated to do so earlier just in case she was in the car. At this point, I thought that it wouldn't hurt to try, and I even had the desperate notion that perhaps she was screening the phone calls (why wouldn't she return them?), or something was wrong with the land line. She sometimes keeps her cell phone on and in bed with her, just in case.

She picked up almost immediately. I was lucky that I phoned right then because she had just come out of the hospital and turned her phone back on. Of course, my head was spinning, trying to figure out why she was back at the hospital, and trying to suppress the anger. She said that the hospital had phoned to ask her to bring my father's lung medicine (don't ask me...I have no idea) either that night or the following morning. Of course, she couldn't wait until the next day because their car had been parked in the lot so long earilier in the day that the parking lot guy had given her a day pass. So, to her, it was free parking.

Did I tell you that they are destitute? They aren't. They just live that way. I'll have to tell you all about how they live in the dark (literally) for fear of spending too much on their electricity bill. People have told me that the house looks vacant 7 days a week. I'm thinking of buying them solar-powered miner's helmets.

So, about 2 hours into an 8 hour shift, I was completely pissed and panicked just because my mother wanted to save a $. Instead of venting and ripping into her, I suppressed it, and took it out on my "guests".

Actually, that's not true. I guess that I was so relieved that she was alive (I can't believe that I'm saying that), that I was in a pretty good mood for the rest of the night. How unusual!

I did have a talk with her the next day. I really wanted to give her shit, especially because she was so paranoid and protective of me and my sister until we graduated from high school. Seriously, we were sheltered. But she was so pleased with herself for surviving, without hurting anyone else or damaging any cars, that I really couldn't give her the lecture I wanted to give her. I did ask her to phone someone before she went out though, because there are some people who care about her safety. This notion seemed to surprise her, which pissed me off again.

And to think that, a few years ago, we used to be a happy family.

Oh, and my father seems to be doing better. His blood pressure is under control, and he's feeling better, although he still is having the odd chest pain. But because it's a long weekend, we're going to have to wait until Tuesday to hear what's happening next.

That's the same day that I start school. I wonder what my mother will do on Tuesday to get me into a panic? I'm sure it'll be something good.

I can hardly wait.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

I am starting my first blog on September 1, 2005. That is how hip and cool I am. I've thought about doing a blog for so long, and now that I have finally gotten around to it, I'm almost caving to the pressure to be profound whilst typing my first entry.

Oh, my. This doesn't bode well.

I started to fill out some of the profile, but I got bored with that...the questions/categories seem so banal. Frankly, I'd prefer to fill in certain blanks as we go along, peeling away the layers like a burlesque girl, until I'm totally but not really naked before you.

Hmmm, I think that things are picking up.

Here are the basics for now. I'm too old to still be living at home, but I am. This is partly my fault, due to an inability to commit to a vocation, an incessant desire to learn, and an inferiority complex which prevents me from acknowledging what I'm good at and taking money for it. I have a bachelor's degree in English and Psychology, and therefore I work in the service industry.

I hate it. But it's a vicious cycle that isn't easily escaped, especially for me. I'm going back to school in a couple of weeks, and that is one of the reasons I started this blog: to chronical my impending success.

And to bitch.

Anyhow, lets review. I live at home (and that's no dream, I'm telling you), and I hate my job/life. Therefore, I'm miserable.

(I'm now explaining my blog's title. Bonus points if you can identify which sitcom it came from.)

I'm little only in terms of height. Bless genetics, I got a lovely mix of my parent's best traits. My mom's height (well, I'm slightly taller than her 4'11", being a lanky 5'5", but not quite 5'11" like my dad), and my dad's "stature", which means that I weigh 180 pds. I've always worn the "husky" size. But I'm lucky in that I have fairly broad shoulders and chest, so I don't look too fat. But according to the "experts", I am overweight. Whatever. I'll have to chat about my sugar addiction later.

Biscuit is a bit of a cheat, because I'm using in the British sense of biscuit = cookie. Therefore, the "biscuit whore" part refers to my love of cookies (see "sugar addiction" in later posts), and the fact that I make pretty good cookies myself. One day, I may sell them. But in the interim, I'd pretty much do anything for a cookie.

And lets get this straight right now: no cookies should have raisins in them. Raisins are the devil's fruit (hence the shrinkage).

Well, that's the name in a nut shell. By the way, nuts are okay in cookies, as long as they aren't walnuts.

Now, I've noticed that blog-folks are always talking about the minute details of their day, and/or commenting on the big picture.

Here are the details from my day: I'm still ferrying my parents around because they are somewhat unable to do so themselves.

There are many reasons for each of them. Mom: has MS, a heart condition, vertigo, and sometimes forgets. Dad: has a lung problem (hopefully not pre-cancerous), a heart problem (waiting for a double-bypass), and a back problem (waiting for surgery).

Anyhow, today's errands involved taking my mom to the clinic to get a prescription renewal, taking me to the chiropractor (anything to get rid of the headaches), taking mom to the pharmacy to pick up another prescription, and taking her to one specific grocery store to pick up chinese food (take-out), and chicken to cook for the dog (the only person she cooks for, and frankly, it's better that way). She has to go to this one grocery store because they have the best chicken, and only the best will do for the dog. And I don't mind that, because he is a super dog (no cape...they're dangerous), and he deserves it. He does a lot of peace-keeping around here. Photos of the dog will be posted soon, when I figure out how to do it.

Well, I'm getting tired now, and I haven't even commented on world events. What could I possibly have to say that John Stewart hasn't already said, and said it better. So for now, I'll leave that kind of stuff to the professionals.

I have considered just listing all the things I am interested in as a cheap way to create an audience, but for now, I'm going to resist the temptation.

For now.