Friday, April 28, 2006

I hate to even say it, but I'm feeling better. The down side is that I had to cancel the meeting today at EchoMemoirs due to the bazooka-vomiting. (two Ts in vomiting?) I postponed it to next Friday, which is when I had suggested to James that we go to Seattle. So the following Friday? Please sign up if you're interested. I have room for only four more passengers. That would be May 12. Anyone know when Mother's Day is happening?

PS: Thanks to Xine for the apple tart and the Nintendo entertainment. The tart was excellent, and the Nintendo was retro-cheesy.
Somehow, I'm sick. In a strange way, too. I haven't been sleeping for the last few nights, which is weird. I used to have sleepless nights when I was going to SFU. Deadlines and such would make me anxious, and I wouldn't be able to sleep. But I've been at the practicum for over two weeks, so you'd think all the anxiety would have happened BEFORE I started at the magazine. And really, there is no anxiety. There's no pressing deadlines for this week. I can handle all of my projects...they're all within the scope of my abilities. So, no anxiety. And yet, when I go to bed at night, me little brain seems a little restless in a very random way. It races a little, from topic to topic. Oh, and when I have fallen asleep for short periods, I've been dreaming really odd dreams that apparently wake me up. It's been years since I had dreams that I could remember once I was awake. It's all very strange, and I really wish that it would go away.

I feel like crap. I look like crap. And I don't feel like doing anything. Bah, humbug.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Yay! Some of you might remember that I had contacted the president of this company, www.echomemoirs.com, last semester for the interview assignment for Collin's class. At the time, she had said that they were really busy, and suggested that I wait until late March, early April. The cool part is that she re-contacted me before I had a chance to get in touch with her. I'm going to see her next Friday, and it should prove to be interesting, especially if I can think of questions to ask her.
Oy, I was back at the golf course Friday and Saturday. Everyone (okay, a few) were asking me if I was glad to be back/how much I had missed it. It turns out, not so much. I was there for maybe 20 minutes when some woman reminded me that I am over the service industry employment. Granted, I was working a memorial, but...there were at least four couples, plus some kids, who were there to set up for the memorial. There were all standing around talking, and I was running around, setting up the bar (hosted...nice memorial). This woman walked halfway across the building, past the chatting folks (and they weren't talking about anything too sacred) and asked me to "help" her move some flowers. By that, I thought that she meant help her. Instead, she meant "move these flowers while I follow you and dither about where they should be." Fine. I suppose that I should be considerate and sympathetic, but I was actually busy doing something, she could see that, and she interrupted me to move two smallish vases of flowers for her. So I put one down, told her to think about where she wanted them, and went and got the other one. Thankfully, she had made up her mind by the time I got back. But seriously, did she have to ask me?

I really hate it when people pretend to be so feeble or special that they can't help themselves. In contrast, at the wedding last night, they moved there own damn tables to make room to take photos, and then moved them back themselves. There were plenty of able-bodied guys, so they realized that they could do it efficiently and quickly themselves, rather than gathering up some staff to do it for them. Consequently, I liked them more.

I've just realized that I need to get a job where no-one bugs me. Great. I'm a miserable bastard. Any suggestions?

Friday, April 21, 2006

The super-good practicum continues to be super good. It's going so well that the Negative Norman part of my personality is really starting to flare up. I'm nervous because I'm certain that the Super Colossal Screw-up is waiting just around the corner, waiting patiently for the right moment to jump out and say "HAH! YOU'RE AN IDIOT!"

So yesterday, the good coolness of the practicum continued. We were told in an early morning meeting with the Editor-in-chief and assistant editor that a fairly-famous movie/tv/something star (they weren't quite certain) was going to be coming to the magazine for a meeting with the president. They weren't certain of her credentials, "She's on some tv show. It's called Small World?" No, it's not a tv show about life in a ride at Disneyland...although that might make a good reality tv show. Who can last the longest listening to that (sorry, but it is ) really, gratingly, mind-numbingly annoying song. But anyhow...

It seems that this semi-famous star is fed up, like many semi-famous stars, of being portrayed only in gossip/tabloid/entertainment magazines. "We're serious, and we're smart, and we can help," they pout, while making millions of dollars for no good reason other than they look good on camera (well, some can act). So they've decided to start their own famous-people-can-save-the-planet magazine, and they stopped by the office to get some information about the magazine world. While the president was taking this starlet and her blonde friend for a tour, I leaned over to my practicum partner and whispered "he's not even going to acknowledge us peons," and, he didn't.

Thanks for the validation. I think that I'll just scurry back into my quaint little corner of the office habitrail.

In some ways, I'm soooo jealous of those of you who are doing nothing but watch movies and sleep in. And least the semi-celibrities shun you from a distance.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Peeps,

My beloved "Grey's Anatomy" was not on tv last night. I had settled in to watch it, and didn't feel like doing much else, so I decided to take a trip through the channels to see what else was on. What I found was a revelation (of sorts). At 10pm on Sunday, on Channel 43, there is a program on called "Mental Engineering". The premise is that a moderator has four smarty-pants guests from various disciplines, and they sit around and talk about tv commercials. But they talk about them in the sense of what is being said, how its being said, is if effective or not, etc. In other words, it's a television show on tv commercial genre analysis. Brilliant. It's quite chatty, and a little funny, and somewhat educational. And it was the only thing on. Still, I might check it out again in the future. I'd like to hear what they have to say about the subtext of the next Gap commercial.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

This little guy was sliming up the kitchen window yesterday, and because school is over, I had time to take about two dozen photographs of him. I have no idea what it is...it looks like a snail (antennae) but without a shell. Still, it looks cool because you can see through him.
Last night was lazy tv-watching night. It took me all day to get the stupid report printed, bound, and delivered to our client. Hopefully, it was worth all the effort.

So at the end of the day, I decided to flake in front of the tv, and watch something I'd taped. Have I admitted my geek about Cirque du Soleil? Here's the confessional: I find Cirque du Soleil entertaining. It's not only because they don't use animal acts in their shows (I don't find "trained" animals entertaining...sad, but not entertaining). It's because there's such a confluence of effort and artistry, not only in the shows themselves but also in the creation and production of the shows. The Cirque creates its own stories, writes its own music, sews its own costumes, develops its own technology. In all, the Cirque is very creative.

Anyhow, the CBC (boo) had televised a "new" Cirque du Soleil show (yay) during our last week of school. So last night I watched the tape. There was one act in particular that made me feel inferior. Granted, I'm not known for my physicality, so pretty much all of it makes me feel inferior. But there was this one guy whose act consisted of climbing up and down a ladder. I have problems climbing up and down a ladder. It's a fear of heights thing. However, this guy had no problems, even though the ladder wasn't leaning against anything. He just stood it straight up into the air and climbed up one side and down the other. He did all kinds of other tricks with it...spinning around, standing on the top... And I can't even stand on a chair! Then again, that's probably the only thing that he can do really well. At least that's what I'll tell myself.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

I'm tired. I'm pissed (angry). I'm fed up (as in pissed). This week, the first week of the practicum, has been exhausting. I had no idea what a work-wimp I am until we started the practicum this week. I don't think that I can hack it, I whine. By 2:30 today, all I could do was stare at the computer screen. It meant nothing to me.

And then, tonight, when I had intended to print off a couple of copies of our lovely research report for our clients, I realized that I was ill-prepared and therefore out of paper. Yay! I wanted to get the thing printed tonight so I could stop by Staples for a quick binding, and then head out to Langley to deliver the goods and the bads to our "client". However, I will be going to Staples first thing in the morning to get paper, returning home to print off the blessed mess, and then returning back to Staples for the bondage session. And what's the point, because the clients will only be in for half a day. So by the time I get all of this done, they'll be gone for the long weekend. Therefore, they'll get it on Tuesday, and have precisely 2 days to read through the 52 pages before the sunny-happy-huggy-thank-you session that officially signals the end of last semester and the beginning of the summer semester.

Arg!

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

These posts are going to continue to be short (which I'm sure is a blessing to some people), because I'm such a wimp and I'm really tired when I get home from "work".

Today we had a full day which included a 2-hour biofeedback session with some whack charlatans who are just down the road from alive and want alive to do a story on their company. I'll preface this next comment by saying that I don't mean to offend with a sweeping generalization, but...I really don't trust any guy/salesman who wears silver-tipped cowboy boots with dress pants and a shirt which is unbuttoned just a little too far. There's no need for chest-carpet, thank you. At least he didn't look greasy.

But the "practitioner" (I have no idea what to call them) told me that I'm really low in ____ vitamin, and that I should eat more carrots. That's funny, because carrots are my staple veggie and I eat them every day. He also told me that I'm slightly overweight (gee, really?), and that I'm a little tired (I wonder if he figured that out because I was almost falling asleep in the chair?). I guess that it was harmless, and a good way to waste two hours. And it was free (they apparently charge $100 for a 2 hr session).

Oh, and the software was full of all these cheesy '70s illustrations of running horses, dolphins, and rip-offs from da Vinci. Classy.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Day one of the practicum is over. I'm tired. I'm sore. I'm not used to sitting at a desk all day. It's surprisingly exhausting.

The day started in relative calm. I had to squeeze through 2 construction zones and one bridge line-up to get there on time. I had about 2 minutes to spare, but I made it. Tomorrow, I'm going to try a different route to see if I can put a different spin on the day.

Actually, that's not really a fair statement. I really enjoyed today. Josie and I got to do some fun things (including letter-writing such as "thanks for your letter, nutjob" to some of the crazy people who write to natural health magazines (a sample: "I'm having trouble with uncontrollable farts and diarrhea...can you recommend anything." The answer which was suggested by the editor-in-chief: a cork.)

We got some research assignments, and some writing assignments. We got our logon codes and all that jazz. The crazy juice lady was right there with her carrot/beet/apple/lemon blend of murkiness when we were just sitting down in our chairs. I believe that the woman is psychic. But in all, it was a very enjoyable day.

I think that I'll go back.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

My post-semester laziness has kicked in big time. My backpack remains fully packed, and is lying in the middle of floor. So far, I've managed to not hurt myself on it. Let's play a fun game and count how long I remain book-bag injury-free.

One thing I plan to do all summer is to share some of the wisdom I find in whatever I'm reading. I have one book in particular which I'm going to share. It's all about ways to get your creativity going, and it presents problems and solutions. While I know that this activity is probably highly illegal, I feel that sharing is good, so I'll share.

The first problem the book discusses is your fear of failure inhibiting idea growth. The book advises that you will always be your own harshest critic. The solution? Hide in a restroom stall. I guess the key here is quiet isolation..."think time". Good idea, except for those people with OCD. They could never get past counting the cracks in the tile or the holes in the ceiling tile to get on to doing something productive. But it's a nice thought. Try it!

Friday, April 07, 2006

The tears have finally stopped, I can now blog. I had to thinly slice two large onions to make pan-fried onion dip. My mother is having family over tomorrow night for snacks and birthday cake. It's a dual-birthday night, as my dad and I were both born in the same month. I was supposed to be born on his birthday April 22, but was 3 weeks premature, which means (for the less-astute), that it was my birthday last weekend. Please don't feel shunned or shut out. I purposefully keep my birthday low-key.

Why, you ask? Let's review...my birthday is April 1st. That means that for the first 12 years of my life, my birthday was a miserable affair. Don't get me wrong. My parents made every effort to make sure that our birthdays were memorable. I was just talking to maikopunk today about an ice-cream place called Farrell's (I'm not certain that's the correct spelling) which was apparently a popular local birthday destination. It was an old-fashioned ice cream parlour kind of place, heavily decorated in red and white, and was on the lower level of the Lougheed Mall. It stands out for the fact that it was an old-fashioned ice cream parlour, and also because the mall was the first place around here with the sloping moving sidewalk (escalator without stairs), and you had to take it to get to Farrell's. Doubly memorable. But it didn't really matter how much my parents tried to make my birthdays memorable, there was always some jackass (usually a particular cousin) who couldn't resist the temptation of April Fools Day, and pull some mean trick on me. Mind you, it never was as bad as the uncles who used to tickle me until I peed myself, but at least that stopped when I got a little older. My birthday still puts me on guard.

Please ask me to tell stories about other birthdays, especially the time my parents nearly got arrested for kidnapping and could have been banned from the US.

Anyhow, as per usual, I have to make the family-favoured Pan Fried Onion Dip. This is a recipe that my sister got from one of her cookbooks (one by the Barefoot Contessa/slob Ina Garten). While I don't recommend Ina Garten, I do recommend this recipe. So here it is.

Thinly slice 2 large yellow onions any way you like, as long as the pieces are about 1/8 inch thick. In a pan, heat 4 tbsp butter and 1/4 cup veggie oil on medium heat. When hot and melty, add the onions, 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper, 1 tsp kosher salt, and 1/2 tsp regular pepper. Saute for 10 minutes on medium heat, and then reduce the heat to med-low (en-dash) for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. You want the onions to caramelize (get golden and good). Let the onions cool.

Once the onions are cool, whiz them through your food processor (unless you like chunky dip). In the bowl of an electric mixer, put 4 ounces of room-temp cream cheese. Blend until smooth. Add 1/2 cup sour cream and 1/2 cup mayonnaise. Blend. Add onions. Blend. Put in bowl. Open a bag of chips or get out the raw veggies, dip, and enjoy. It's super-yummy.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

For those of you who worried about my safety on public transit (which was probably only me...you uncaring transit-savvy bastards), I did get home safely last night. Although the lovely young woman who said "fuck" every second word during her tirade against the transit cops ("no, I fucking don't have a fucking transfer. You fucking took it away from me fucking last week. Fuck!"), spiced up the short, four-stop trip, it was quite enough for one day. Thank you.

So today, as I knew would happen, my parents and I drove to the Westminster Quay for lunch (lunch is also always a part of the deal for my family...a nod to meladuck's family). Part of that deal is that I check out Timeless Books at the Quay, which always has amazing deals on cheap books, and, I just noticed, an amazing selection of magazines (way more than Chapters). I bought $220 of books (before tax) for $54 (before tax). Yay! The good finds were "Design Your Own Homepage ($10), "Information Architecture for the World Wide Web" ($6), "The Fall of Advertising and the Rise of PR" ($5), and "Thinking with Type: A Critical Guide for Designers, Writers, Editors, and Students" ($8).

Then, after I had rescued my car from the parkade (it had been parked there overnight because I still can't tell time), I drove home. Driving up the hill from DC, I nearly rear-ended the pick-up in front of me which was going about 5 kms/hr. I was just thinking "what the hell?" when I figured out what he was looking at: some Rubenesque young woman walking up the hill, wearing one of those trendy frilly little miniskirts which, when the wearer walks on level ground, barely covers the hoo-hah, but when you walk up the hill...not so much coverage. Couldn't see the thong...just assuming, and hoping, that there was one.

Which brings up the topic of attire. It may just be me, but I think that our dear classmate, who is quite a good person, was asking way too much of the zipper on her pants last night at the grad show. She needs to buy some of those super-strong undergarments and give that zipper a rest.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

I'm really not motivated to do anything right now, so instead of writing an executive summary and transmittal correspondence, and instead of creating graphics, I'll write about Girl Guide cookies.

In case you didn't know...they're out. I just had a handful, and let me say that they're kinda meh. I heard that they'd changed manufacturers. You wouldn't think that would make much of a difference, but it did. The biscuit part is quite crispy...maybe even dry. And the filling...the vanilla is a little light on the vanilla, and the chocolate is a little heavy on the cocoa (in a bad way...bitter, not miserable). The mint ones are also out. Hopefully they will be better. But alas, perhaps this way I won't waste any money on getting fat with the help from the Girl Guides and their cookies. And by the way...I'm not even considering that the Girl Guides sell the cookies to raise money. It's all about me.
I'm really not motivated to do anything right now, so instead of writing an executive summary and transmittal correspondence, and instead of creating graphics, I'll write about Girl Guide cookies.

In case you didn't know...they're out. I just had a handful, and let me say that they're kinda meh. I heard that they'd changed manufacturers. You wouldn't think that would make much of a difference, but it did. The biscuit part is quite crispy...maybe even dry. And the filling...the vanilla is a little light on the vanilla, and the chocolate is a little heavy on the cocoa (in a bad way...bitter, not miserable). The mint ones are also out. Hopefully they will be better. But alas, perhaps this way I won't waste any money on getting fat with the help from the Girl Guides and their cookies. And by the way...I'm not even considering that the Girl Guides sell the cookies to raise money. It's all about me.